My anthem at the moment.
Category Archives: Being Mum
It frustrates me so much that as women we are forced to live in a society which works for men and takes no account for the cyclical nature of women. It is in no way detrimental to a woman’s ability that hormones play such a role in controlling which aspects of her are more predominant at any one time, but it is significant and shouldn’t be overlooked.
I listened to a fabulous talk on this topic from Juliet Platt at Treetops Communications which really spoke to me. She talked about how full of energy, enthusiasm and creativity we tend to be in the first two weeks of our monthly cycles but how in the later weeks we tend to be more reserved and less effusive and more pensive. Both of these qualities are equally valuable but organising your life to take account of where preferences lie during different stages allows you to make full use of your strengths.
Now, what brought me to writing this post comes at the very end of the month. First comes a day or so of being unable to achieve anything, making up for the insane productivity at the beginning of the month, then the evil that is PMT. PMT is something so often underestimated but so very very real. I know from my own experiences that I turn into a person I hate for one day a month, sometimes it’s only about 12 hours but for that time I have no control over the rage that I feel. I sob for absolutely no reason, I am a complete bitch to everyone around me and worse, I know I am doing it and have absolutely no ability to control it. Then, following the evil mood comes the crippling pain. In any other situation pain like that would involve a day in bed, certainly not battling through work and childcare. Just because it happens on a monthly basis doesn’t make it any less real or any less painful. Why is it that women are always expected to just carry on. To try to pretend they are not suffering and to act as if they feel fine. I am often heard belittling what is complete agony as ‘just period pains, nothing to worry about’. We have been conditioned to try to hide our cycles and to carry on regardless. What we should really be doing is embracing them. Giving ourselves the time we need during the low days so we have the energy to achieve the impossible on the high days.
I was having a chat on Twitter with @Lebowski74 and got onto the topic of cloth nappies which prompted me to write this post. We all know having a baby is a very expensive business, but one way to not only save money but also save the environment is to use cloth nappies. I used cloth on my three and they have certainly moved on a lot since my childhood days of terry squares, pins, boil washing and plastic pants. I did choose to use terry squares because I found them to be incredibly versatile and they are also one of the cheapest options out there, but there are fitted, shaped, all-in-one, two part, coloured, patterned, you name it! Whatever your baby’s shape and size and what ever your lifestyle there is something to suit your family.
I think the one thing that has stuck in my mind is how much cloth nappying parents love nappies – there is nothing as satisfying as seeing a fairy baby bottom and a line full of nappies flapping in the breeze. I have never ever heard anyone say they love their disposables.
I was a full-time stay at home mum for over 8 years. I wanted to be there for my babies more than anything and felt like for our family it was the best arrangement. When Cola started school I decided it was time to go back to work and do something for me. I have always wanted to work and have a career of my own, but while the little ones were preschoolers I put it all on hold to be there for them.
It was a huge wrench leaving them in childcare to go to work and whilst I love my job and am much more fulfilled in life now, I don’t think it would have been possible without the two nannies the children have had. It was scary to employ a nanny, especially because we had a temporary one first before the permanent one started. Fortunately the arrangement suited everyone involved. I was nervous choosing to use a nanny over other forms of childcare, I didn’t really know anyone else who had gone down this route so couldn’t get advice and recommendations easily.
However, I cannot stress enough how lucky I have been to find our nanny. She is brilliant with the kids, helps around the house (even though I would never ask or expect her too), is totally reliable, helps out when the kids are sick and is generally a total angel. Going out to work is hard enough when you have children, but if I was worried about the care the children were getting I wouldn’t be able to enjoy my job as much as I do and my stress levels would be through the roof. I so often hear horror stories from people, but rarely do childcarers get the recognition that they deserve. So here’s to all the childcarers who, like ours, makes being a working parent a million times easier!
Sunday nights are the worst night of the week for this working mum. For some reason for the rest of the weekend I seem to forget that I have a million jobs to get done. It doesn’t matter how many good intentions I have, I always end up leaving vast amounts of housework and organising for a Sunday night.
So, probably best to spend less time blogging and more time scrubbing!
I rarely get to spend some time with my boys on our own, so when Cola was at a party we had a lovely couple of hours just the three of us at Jubilee Lake and then wandering around Wootton Bassett. It’s nice not be split three ways sometimes and I thoroughly enjoyed some time just listening to them and the products of their rather overactive imaginations. I even managed to teach them about Latin, although I did get some strange looks from the anglers at the lake who overhead and clearly thought I was mental!
Cola joined Rainbows a couple of weeks ago and is absolutely loving it. She went in her new uniform for the first time tonight. She is so very proud of her uniform and bag.
It’s really nice to see her doing something I enjoyed as a child. Not Rainbows (I am so old it didn’t exist back in my day!) but I did love Brownies, Guides and even a short and very alcohol fueled time at Venture Scouts. I just hope she enjoys it all as much as I did.